Feelings of help/powerlessness...

I ought to do other things than writing... I am going to be at work the whole afternoon. Need to practice myself... Too.

But have thought about the topic help/powerlessness...

What are those feelings about? Are they the child's feelings once? From a state when the adult WAS power/helpless?? And she (he) takes this with her/him into adult life... And this feeling (reaction) is expressed (especially) in certain circumstances?

I am thinking both about grown ups feeling incapable of doing anything! Paralyzed (mentally) and totally helpless. I can't do anything... etc. And thinking that

"It's my character! (I can't do anything)"

But from where do these feelings (maybe or most probably) origin from? From the small child, who was badly treated, maybe even very badly treated?? Laughed at, scorned, shouted at, treated "violently", maybe even sexually abused (or "at least" improperly touched) etc. etc. etc.

Truths one don't want to admit to? Truths about ones own parents!?? How they actually were, how it actually was!!??

These things are also shown on a societal level? People thinking it's no idea at all to try to influence!! For instance by voting in elections!! Mistrusting politicians. But this is horrible!!

Where do this lead?

A certain sort of people goes on voting, and the ones still voting are to a high degree those voting on extreme parties (nationalist, "xenophobic" parties)???

So where has this child abuse led?? People paralyzed? Thinking they have no power?? Not capable of intervening? On any level maybe? Not even on a familial, by protecting weaker for instance? Incapable of leaving abusive relations? etc. etc. etc.

But were we born this way? So incapable of doing something, of acting, reacting??

Yes, the parents were complete, perfect?? In difference to ones children? Even to ones now grown up children struggling to deal with their own!!!?? They are much less complete than the old and dead parents were or ever became? They were angels, or??? And what they did one can belittle and minimize in comparison to how one treats and handle ones grown up children's misses, and imperfection!?? Because the difference is enormous?? Ones own children are shit compared to ones parents?? Sacrificing ones own children on the altar of -what? (but of course these children are now grown up, and thus they have responsibility for their own stuff).

Some (maybe not so few?) in power uses this (both unconsciously and consciously, and also deliberately)?? For instance in politics! Playing on this? Relying on this? Even using this with no scruples??

Yes, Naomi Klein is right: Information (and a greater and greater awareness of these facts, about the roots to those things, the simple answers??) are shock resistance?? And hopefully also a protection against abuse, even abuse on a political level??

And have a long way to go still myself... I don't say I handle this good... I struggle with these things myself...

Addition: and it is always possible to find people who have had it worse, so when am I entitled to complain??

And I am also very critical to the help that is offered; you are (only) learned to cope and/or to change a dysfunctional behavior to a functional... Because it is still forbidden to question ones parents?? And I came to think about what Jenson wrote about Dan... He wasn't capable of stopping from following a woman (compulsively) that had abused him when he saw her until he got access to things in his early history thanks to a good therapy? After that he had no problems at all when he met this woman!

And I know of a woman aware that her mother pulled her kids hair, and that she got severely spanked, but these memories hasn't changed anything? She can talk about this, but with few emotions connected!?? No rebellion or real questioning what her mother did. And probably no realization how this felt actually?? The rage (etc.) that would have been adequate?? (and did the father protect his kids against this???).

Because it isn't only about remembering?? You have to be helped to see it as wrong and to question it!!?? Yes, maybe even get permission doing this?? By a helper, expert!?? Realizing it wasn't your fault, you didn't deserve it. And question what this actually was supposed to teach one? And what one learned from this actually and what t has led to, all the possible consequences?? But this is probably extremely painful...

And I also know of man reacting at his own father who humiliated his children in front of other on one (or a few) occasions, but this realization didn't protect this father from doing the same thins with his own kids later!!??

So pure memories aren't enough?

Today the knowledge exists that perhaps didn't exist then... And all has those options! Even (old) parents...

"But it happened so long ago! I have went on with my life!!"

To avoid the feelings of vulnerability one can use anger or deny ones needs... And thus get a sense of power. A power one maybe don't need to exercise or demonstrate today!? Because today one has the power one didn't have then. Knowing what is what: what my anger is about... That's the problem... So it is used more productively... Because of course there are reasons today to get angry - too!! But if I am acting on something pas it's risk I behave destructively or self-destructively!?? And in a way that gains noone and even can become harmful??

Denying ones needs is also so sad and maybe even tragic many times? Trying to fill ones childhood needs instead of ones grown up needs!?? How much hasn't that costed? And still costs?

Help/powerlessness is about the past usually?? Except for extreme circumstances??