Some thoughts on the bike to work, threw those words down quickly on paper when I came to work, before the first student. I write them down here almost as I wrote them down this morning:
Limit setting for children are hotter than ever again, but letting the market totally free is ok, absolutely nothing wrong with or anything to worry about. Children, on the contrary, need restrictions, restrictions for instance the market doesn’t need. How would it be if children didn't get restrictions? Where would it end? Or it's for "their own good" and the world's good? Those children will grow up to good citizens, capable of handling and managing a free market or something?
Liberals are talking about freedom in one circumstance, but discipline in another.
Integrity – what about?
Respect – what about?
True, genuine respect and capacity to that sort of respect…
You (the people on the bottom and children) need to earn your freedom?? I wonder if all are entitled or worth freedom in a liberal’s world actually if you scratch on the surface?
The same confusing messages many of us got early??
When I was student at a folk high school here in Sweden after quitting the gymnasium we spoke about let-go (låt-gå in Swedish, or laissez-faire), authoritarian and democratic leadership (in teachers in this case I think). More than thirty years ago we were learned that the democratic leadership was the best.
Have some (many) liberals misunderstood what "freedom" is? Confused it with laissez-faire combined with authoritarianism? I wonder quite ironically.
It stood on the Swedish Radio site that registration of bloggers is on its way in Europe – The European Union wants to control bloggers.
The parliament is voting about a draft law this fall that EU shall register and control bloggers on the net.
The Estonian European parliamentarian Marianne Mikko (belonging to the socialist group!??) the initiative taker to the law, says that if we see name and picture on the one writing this promotes the freedom of speech. She thinks the anonymity on the net is a problem. And wants that bloggers legal status shall be clarified and categorized from their opinion and agenda.
This new law has been lively discussed among bloggers on the net the last days and many are upset. One of them are Emma Marie Andersson *who blogs about politics and integrity questions.
“For most bloggers I should in fact think that anonymity is a prerequisite, because all employers for example don’t think it’s so good if one sits and writes and has opinions.”
Marianne Mikko means that the possibility replying in charge to a blogposting has to be strengthened for the sake of democracy!! One needs to be able to reply in the same manner as to articles in for example newspapers she says!! She says:
“I don’t believe in one-way-communication!”
But Emma Marie Andersson thinks the blogs rather are more open than traditional media. And now in the aftermaths of the FRA-law politicians need to really think over what one can and shall regulate she thinks. So true.
“Precisely this, with replying, is extremely strange, for this only proves that she has obviously never visited a blog./…/ The fact is that you as blogger and person discussed on a blog has more opportunities answering in a blog than in a newspaper actually.
Now people have got the taste for airing their opinions and therefore more and more people are interested in how things like these turn out. So it’s in all people’s interest trying to become friend with the Internet and realize that Internet isn’t a thing lying somewhere far away, but Internet is actually a part of the society, and it’s we, the people, who find ourselves there.”
A female Swedish blogger I appreciate a lot also writes about this new law. She writes that everything is obviously going to become controlled! Where does the boundary go? If one want to stop a blogger there are already possibilities. And now comes extra controls or demands the bloggers shall display their photos and names. Postings are already possible to report and stop. And that's fully enough. She also wonders how one shall be able to control if people use their own names or photos, and not others...
"By the way - photo??"
she writes.
"Maybe one has to be both beautiful and photogenic to be allowed to blog? And soon we have the entire control-society."
Another female Swedish blogger writes that "Perhaps it's time for the European Union to register our private diaries too..." She thinks one of the worst things is that politicians prove they don't know what they are talking about or what Internet is! And thinks this is like the pure Soviet-state! And we have a right government in Sweden!!! And it's a right wind in Europe!!! Many have written about a big-brother society!
And here an article "The Economics for Nice People" concerning incitements for people, that they are all and only economic? And selfish?? I.e. that we never do anything without expecting something in return...
* "Vissa lagar som syftar till att bekämpa kriminaliteten är ännu mera kriminella " — Friedrich Engels
“The poorest man may in his cottage bid defiance to all the force of the Crown. It may be frail, its roof may shake, the wind may blow through it; the storms may enter, the rain may enter - but the King of England cannot enter; all his forces dare not cross the threshold of the ruined tenement.” — William Pitt
Människorna är grymma mitt barn och storhetsvansinniga hela mänskligheten är storhetsvansinnig vart vi än ser ser vi storhetsvansinnig mänsklighet vi är mitt i en katastrofal fördumningsprocess (Thomas Bernhard, his official home-site)
my amateur-translation: The human beings are cruel my child and megalomaniac the whole of mankind is megalomaniac wherever we see we see megalomaniac mankind we are in the middle of a catastrophic dulling-of-the-intellect-process [so true!!! Does the power think people are stupid?? Arrogantly acting over our heads?] --- We live in a political world Love don’t have any place We’re living in times where men commit crimes And crime don’t have a face We live in a political world Where courage is a thing of the past Houses are haunted, children are unwanted The next day could be your last (Bob Dylan)
I have had a book (among many!) lying here and started to read it yesterday. It’s by the Swedish author Bodil Malmsten (living in France since six years). Her blog (in Swedish) here. I used to be fonder of her earlier. Laughed a lot when I read her former book three years ago. She is in denial about the severity of childhood experiences I think. But that’s another question, and another posting?
Anyway, I want to quote her.
She reacted a lot against Nicolas Sarkozy who said fall 2005 during the revolts in France that if certain immigrants don’t like France there is no reason for them to stay!!! Something that became a law spring 2006 as she writes!
She writes that if a foreigner is judged for rebellious behaviour – rebellion - the one in question looses his/her long-term residence permission (uppehållstillstånd) and is given – if the person is lucky – a temporary residence permission which has to be reconsidered (omprövat) yearly (årligen)!
The same destiny befalls those immigrants who don’t show due (tillbörlig) respect (!!!) for the French flag and national-hymn!!
How is this possible? How come this is opportune today?? How can one say such things? Why don’t people react? And react MUCH MORE? And much louder!
Malmsten says she is stricken by how invisible Sarkozy succeeded being then (before he was elected president 2007), especially when things were burning, then he managed to look as if he didn’t belong to the unpopular government! But usually, or in all other occasions he succeeded in being nearest all cameras and microphones she writes (quite ironical, and yes, she watches French TV-news? So she must see more than we do)!!!
A radio-reporter Anne Sinclair with a lot of routine makes comparisons between today’s demonstrations and the demonstrations 1968. 1968 the youth demonstrated with a hope for the future. The students rebelled against the old, reactionary and hardened (förstockade), while the youth of today rebels of fear for their future. Doesn’t sound good!! This is horrible I think.
I will quote more when I come back from work later today. Really want to write more about this.
After work, continuation (sidetrack: maybe I could learn something from her: namely writing much more briefly!? Or?):
She writes more about the demonstrations in France: The school-minister (Sarkozy then?He was both minister of interior and for the education 2005-2007?) in France was forced to say that the government was open for dialogue about CPE (contrat première embaucheor First Employment Contract), the minister said it was still time for dialogue (!!!).
“That’s what’s so good with murmurs of discontent (missnöjesyttringar) as yesterday’s demonstrations.
For if all these students, employees, people connected with the trade-unions and people not connected with them, younger and older who demonstrated in Paris yesterday, had stayed at home and got out burnt each one of them, then the government hadn’t become forced to take the time for dialogue as is necessary in a democracy, before the changes which affects a whole people are carried through .”
She writes about her sister’s cat lying at a hospital in Stockholm with drop. So what? The Avian fluis ravaging in the world just now (written a couple of years ago?). In this devastated world with its starvation, its epidemics, its increasing gaps between poor and rich. Its wars, its middle-east, its Rwanda, its Darfour.
One chapter has the title “Why are you so angry, Bodil Malmsten?”
And she answers for instance (my a little free translation and interpretation):
“Why I am angry?
I am not angry.
I am exhilarated and grateful for living in a world more complicated than I myself am./…/
I fear all groups more than everything else and all sorts of grouping.
I am against the family as a power factor but for the individuals in it; I love my family – the whole humanity – but I have difficulties with a lot of people.
But not all, not all the time, not at all.
I love all respecting the security-distance /…/
I hate hierarchies.
A woman at the top or not – it’s the power structure I am against. /…/
I am against Nicolas Sarkozy /…/ and everything he stands for – harder grips and bang! at the weaker.”
PS. In the evening: it stands that Sarkozy's father was immigrant from Hungary and his mother has Greek ancestors; from the aristocracy ("hypocrisy"??) in both cases!!! And the radio-reporter Anne Sinclair is daughter of a rich industry-man, but she seems to stand on the "weak's" side despite HER background!! She is 7 years older than Sarkozy? Her grandfather owned art-galleries (if I understood the French right?? :-) It's 35 years since I read French).
We live in a political world
We live in a political world, Love don't have any place. We're living in times where men commit crimes And crime don't have a face
We live in a political world, Icicles hanging down, Wedding bells ring and angels sing, clouds cover up the ground.
We live in a political world, Wisdom is thrown into jail, It rots in a cell, is misguided as hell Leaving no one to pick up a trail.
We live in a political world Where mercy walks the plank, Life is in mirrors, death disappears Up the steps into the nearest bank.
We live in a political world Where courage is a thing of the past Houses are haunted, children are unwanted The next day could be your last.
We live in a political world. The one we can see and can feel But there's no one to check, it's all a stacked deck, We all know for sure that it's real.
We live in a political world In the cities of lonesome fear, Little by little you turn in the middle But you're never why you're here.
We live in a political world Under the microscope, You can travel anywhere and hang yourself there You always got more than enough rope.
We live in a political world Turning and a'thrashing about, As soon as you're awake, you're trained to take What looks like the easy way out.
We live in a political world Where peace is not welcome at all, It's turned away from the door to wander some more Or put up against the wall.
We live in a political world Everything is hers or his, Climb into the frame and shout God's name But you're never sure what it is.
”Emil och Alfred tar ett kvällsdopp i Katthultsjön efter en sommardag full av lek och hyss. Solen börjar sänka sig över skogarna när Emil säger till Alfred:
In this blog I want to explore the effects of childhood experiences on individual lives, the health (not only the emotional/psychological, but also, and not least, the bodily/somatic), the society, why people seek themselves to power positions, the effect of childhood on politics.
With the ideas that imbue Alice Miller's work and writing.
And sometimes just share things I have read and come across and I agree with and couldn't have said better myself.
I work full time with young people since many years, as teacher in music (piano pedagogue), and am interested in these things, both privately/personally and professionally.
But my time is limited to write and blog, even if it probably doesn't look so.
I will devote myself to loud thinking a lot here I think. And this blog is also a way for me to collect texts, facts, links, sites I want to save for further use maybe.
Makt avslöjar en persons grundläggande moral …
-
View this post on Instagram Och detta gäller på ALLA nivåer. — Related Mer
om självhävdelse – ord för hjärta är också metaforer för styrka, mod,
stolthet, ...
This feed has moved and will be deleted soon. Please update your
subscription now.
-
We've Moved! Update your Reader Now. This feed has moved to:
*http://feeds.feedblitz.com/phdinparenting*
Update your reader now with this changed subscri...
Crisis
-
I suppose some people might wonder why I'm not completely hysterical. Why
would I be hysterical? The building where I've lived for 22 years is
scheduled fo...
-
Pharmaceutical marketing expert witness [image: screen2largeMM]
Dr. Peter Rost is a former Pfizer Marketing Vice President providing
services as a marketi...
Påskuppropet mot sjukförsäkringar
-
Idag var det manifestation. Mycket bra. Jag var där. Mycket bra.
Men någonting gnagde mig på vägen hem. För stämningen var mer uppgiven än
arg, och det ä...
Arbeidet med ny side er i gang!
-
Nå har arbeidet med domeneregistrering og nytt design startet og jeg gleder
meg til jeg kan vise dere resultatet! Det skal bli bra å få Psykiskbloggen
over...
Click on the picture to go to Astrid Lindgren site.
Books I am referring to on this blog:
Bosch, Ingeborg: "Rediscovering the True Self"
Freyd, Jennifer J.: "Betrayal Trauma - The Logic of Forgetting Childhood Abuse" ISBN 0-647-06806-8
Jenson, Jean: "Reclaiming Your Life" ISBN 91-46-17409-5
Kirkengen, Anna Luise: "Hvordan krenkede barn blir syke voksne" ISBN 82-15-00713-9 ("How Abused Children Become Unhealthy Adults")
Kirkengen, Anna Luise: "Inscribed bodies - Health Impact of Childhood Sexual Abuse" ISBN 0-7923-7019-8
Lewis Herman, Judith: "Trauma and Recovery - From Domestic Violence to Political Terror" ISBN 086358430-6 (svensk översättning finns: ”Trauma och tillfrisknande” ISBN10: 9197263133, ISBN13: 9789197263139, Förlag: Göteborgs Psykoterapi Institut)
Miller, Alice: "Den dolda nyckeln" ISBN 91-46-15747-6 (The Untouched Key)
Miller, Alice: "Det självutplånande barnet och sökandet efter en äkta identitet" ISBN 91-7643-559-8 (The Drama of the Gifted Child)
Miller, Alice: "Du skall icke märka - variationer över paradistemat" ISBN 91-46-14374-2 (Thou Shalt Not Be Aware)
Miller, Alice: "Riv tigandets mur - sanning byggd på fakta" ISBN 91-46-16022-1 (Breaking Down the Wall of Silence)
Miller, Alice: "The Body Never Lies - The Lingering Effects of Cruel Parenting" ISBN 0-393-06065-9
Miller, Alice: "The Truth Will Set You Free - Overcoming Emotional Blindness and Finding Your True Adult Self" ISBN 0-465-04585-5
Miller, Alice: "Vägar i livet - sju berättelser" ISBN 91-46-17414-1 (Paths of Life - Seven Scenarios)
Pincus, Jonathan H.: "Base Instincts - What Makes Killers Kill?" ISBN 0-393-32323-4
Children baking...
Look, the joy in the children?? Enjoying what they are doing? (illustration from one of the books by Astrid Lindgren, click on the picture to go to her site).
"...of all the many forms of child abuse, emotional abuse may be the cruelest and longest-lasting of all.” "Emotional abuse is the systematic diminishment of another. It may be intentional or subconscious (or both), but it is always a course of conduct, not a single event. It is designed to reduce a child's self-concept to the point where the victim considers himself unworthy—unworthy of respect, unworthy of friendship, unworthy of the natural birthright of all children: love and protection." (Andrew Vachss)
"A long habit of not thinking a thing wrong, gives it a superficial appearance of being right, and raises at first a formidable outcry in defense of custom." -- "Common Sense", Thomas Paine, January 10, 1776
"Modern education is competitive, nationalistic and separative. It has trained the child to regard material values as of major importance, to believe that his nation is also of major importance and superior to other nations and peoples. The general level of world information is high but usually biased, influenced by national prejudices, serving to make us citizens of our nation but not of the world." (Albert Einstein)
"Normal men have killed perhaps 100,000,000 of their fellow men in the last fifty years... Given these and other conditions of contemporary civilization, how can one claim that the ‘normal’ man is sane?" (R.D. Laing, 1967)
"Organizations take on characteristics of the people running them./.../ There's always pressure within groups to conform, anyway. The top monkey exerts the most pressure." (Steve Thomas)
"Yet many psychiatrists and psychologists refuse to entertain the idea that society as a whole may be lacking in sanity. They hold that the problem of mental health in a society is only that of the number of 'unadjusted' individuals, and not of a possible unadjustment of the culture itself." (Erich Fromm in The Sane Society, 1955)
When a big kid hits a little kid, we call it bullying. When an adult hits another adult, we call it assault. When the adults in a family hit each other we call it battering or domestic violence. When an adult hits a child we call it discipline..
“Blindness and lack of connectedness whether truly needed or not, are ultimately tragic solutions to life. These adaptations keep us from knowing ourselves and others fully. We end up fragmented both internally and externally – impoverished spiritually and socially /…/ it seriously constrains our human potential /…/ Survivors of childhood sexual abuse and betrayal blindness have learned to cope by being disconnected internally so as to manage a minimal kind of external connection. But with adult freedom and responsibility come the potential to break silence, to use voice and language to promote internal integration, deeper external connection, and a social transformation, Through communication – integration within ourselves and connection between individuals – we can become whole; embodied, aware, vital, powerful”(Jennifer Freyd in the chapter “Removing Blinders, Becoming Connected” in her book “Betrayal Trauma…”).
“If you are very strong you have to be very kind” (Pippi Longstocking)
“In psychiatry, too, what a person says and writes can’t be divorced from who he is and how he lives.” (Thomas Szasz).
“The method of Marshall Rosenberg is very nice and may be helpful to people who have not be[been??] severely mistreated in childhood. The latter ones however must find their pent up, LEGITIMATE rage and free themselves from the lies of our moral system. As long as they don't do this, their body will continue to scream for the truth with the help of symptoms" (Alice Miller)
“To desire and strive to be of some service to the world, to aim at doing something which shall really increase the happiness and welfare and virtue of mankind - this is a choice which is possible for all of us; and surely it is a good haven to sail for" (Henry van Dyke)
“‘I have never met a man,’ said Grandma Georgina, ‘who talks so much absolute nonsense!’ ‘A little nonsense now and then, is relished by the wisest men,’ Mr Wonka said.” (Roald Dahl)
Look at his facial expression! Angrily carving… The stubborn, disobedient child... Or? How does he feel there in his joiner's workshop? (click on the picture to go to Astrid Lindgren site).
About the ACE-study:
"It's not just water under the bridge."
ACEs are surprisingly common among people of all social strata, and have far-reaching consequences. For many people, it's not possible to "just get over it".
What's an ACE (Adverse Childhood Experience i.e. "skadlig barndomserfarenhet")? Adverse Childhood Experience is growing up experiencing any of the following conditions in the household prior to age 18:
1. Recurrent physical abuse
2. Recurrent emotional abuse
3. Contact sexual abuse
4. An alcohol and/or drug abuser in the household
5. An incarcerated household member
6. Someone who is chronically depressed, mentally ill, institutionalized, or suicidal
I don't like being photographed, and don't have many photos of myself but here are some, though fairly old! Click on the picture to see two more pictures.
I was born in Umeå in Västerbotten, Sweden, and moved during childhood stepwise to Skåne in the south, and at last back to just below the middle of Sweden where I still live.
I am educated both as piano-pedagogue and church-musician and have a full time employment as piano-pedagogue. Church-music is side work.
I am interested in a lot of things and will blog about things I read, psychology, society, history, nature, my work too hopefully, and my everyday life… And both in Swedish and English.
This is a blog, with my (sometimes very) personal - and loud reflections on what I read, see, hear, react on, feel for - and not feel for and want to explore. I don't work in this field at all, but I have my reflections and thoughts nevertheless and have read fairly a lot I think, and here I reflect upon all this. I am searching myself forward. I link sites for information, if one want to know more about what I am talking/writing about and what is mentioned in the texts I am citing and referring to. And I link sites not least for my own sake. So it isn’t sure I agree with all that is linked on this blog, that's not why I link sites. I can agree with parts of what is linked, bigger or smaller, from almost everything to almost nothing.
I hope those who perhaps find my blog are reading everything here critically - including what stands in what I link.
And when it comes to therapy and all (self)help-concepts I think one shall be very careful. Maybe as a friend said it:
“Meaningful critical thinking.
Psychotherapists have been claiming that they have invented better treatment methods since Sigmund Freud in 1897. The amount of psychological distress in the world hasn’t become less. There’s money to be made from attracting more clients, whether the therapy works or not.