And when people at last start speaking up, are trying to use their voices, her/his language, how do you meet her/him? How do you react? On the content? On how it is said, the manner, the form? Yes, of course, if that person says things in a bad manner and says bad things… Then you react, maybe have to react!!?
Not least my dad had high demands? We should know and manage things at once, immediately!! His patient was limited, and maybe even hardly existing?? We should understand things that possibly had no idea about before and manage things immediately, as for instance when we should learn to cycle... I wasn't old and I had a big bike... Not a child's bike.
That summer we were at my aunt's home when mom and dad where in Germany (but that was the only time they were abroad together), and there I learned to cycle. When mom and dad returned I should proudly surprise them with coming there cycling. I had my aunt's bike (also a big bike, which still stands in an an outhouse where she lived!??). Came down the road, but drove out into the gravel near the ditch and fell. I broke my collarbone and we drove on fairly bad roads to the nearest doctor, 40-50 kilometers away...
When we came home again I helped my aunts husband with throwing firewood down in their cellar, despite I was hurt... The clever girl.
Hmmm, are they better with children who are parents??? Does this automatically make one better with them? If I have no other examples I have my dad??? Father to six children…
And later when you asked for help, had questions, clear; when do you use this expression and when this? What’s the difference between this expression and this? Nuances in language etc. You didn’t get any real answers… That’s really strange! Because the one that got the questions last believes in the ideas of giving children a voice!!!
Was this only (or mostly) rhetorical?
I saw a TV-program long ago, a café-program, where they interviewed a "laugh-therapist", quite sceptical I listened to it… This therapist was an older woman, maybe in her sixties… But in the end I thought she was quite likeable!! SHE was, but I am still sceptical to laugh-therapy and different methods and concepts… She said one thing, that made an indelible expression (!!??) and that was that she admitted that she maybe didn’t live as she learned always!! At that time there was someone in my life that couldn’t really do this? So filled with his own enormous importance (and probably very insecure?) I think. So it was so liberating to hear her, a mature woman saying this!?
And by the way, I think my dad was a little like that, he couldn’t admit wrongdoings?? And treated us as we were dull and not knowing, as there was no idea to really discuss with us... He was educated agronomist, educated at Ultuna, belonging to the University of Uppsala. Now I see that this education is only 4, 5 years! I thought it was 5!! A brother and a sister are agronomists too, and have one year pedagogy on top of this! This means that I maybe have more academic points than they! I didn't believe I had!!! (and we the oldest have the longest and/or prestigious educations of six siblings! A male therapist said something ironical that I mentioned the ones that was "best" educated first, a sigh! But I took us in order... And what does this say maybe? About demands, high demands? But our roads has not been lying there straight... We haven't walked from success to success... And we are all hard-working? A sigh. Not taking a lot of space? Or? Doing our best? I think)
Came to think of “The Tao of Pooh” by Benjamin Hoff, somewhere there it stands about the very quiet voice as you hardly can hear in the beginning, the trick of following it?
It stands something about Hoff that as interesting:
“Hoff grew up in Sylvan, Oregon, where he acquired a fondness of the natural world that has been highly influential in his writing. /…/ Prior to his career in writing, he worked as a tree pruner, antiques restorer, hospital orderly, investigative reporter, photojournalist, recording musician, singer, and songwriter. In his spare time, he practices Taoist yoga and Tai Chi Chuan.”
Earlier postings on clever child (both in Swedish and in English).
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