More on understanding the child…

Emil in Lönneberga.

See Peter Haiman who for instance writes in the article “How To Prevent Sibling Rivalry”:

“In fact, many experts fail to do what is perhaps most important when it comes to dealing with sibling rivalry: look at what is happening through the child’s emotional eyes. And so the parents they advise also fall short in this way. Parents try hard to be helpful, but they do so from the point of view of a caring parent. They don’t always understand what their children are trying to tell them.

For a moment, imagine yourself as an infant. Look at and feel things as...”

Also for instance read “The Case Against Time-Out.” (my addition: not manipulate the child emotionally either).

About trying to see it from the child’s point of view, putting yourself in the child’s place and situation, to understand (and know) that there are reasons for the child’s behavior, i.e., emotionally understand your child. What empathy is about.

Something that’s probably difficult for many (actually almost all) of us (but to slightly different degrees) because this awakes our early experiences, which are very painful. We ought to get help, and help each other, to call things in question... Much, much more than we do!